Pete Thamel's article about Kevin Durant in today's New York Times should be required reading for every young athlete in America. When I was the Athletics Director at Trinity Episcopal School, we had three words emblazoned on the wall in the Trinity Center for Arts and Athletics (right under the scoreboard): RESPECT, TEAMWORK, PERSEVERANCE. These words serve as Pillars that educators can "teach to" every day with quotes, stories, probing questions, and by the way they conduct a class or practice. Kevin Durant lives by these three words. Thamel's article reveals this with real life examples:
RESPECT
. "Durant treated the equipment manager and the trainer in Oklahoma City with the same kindness and consideration that he treated the coaching staff and front office."
. As a member of the USA Basketball team he defers to older players like Chauncey Billups and Lamar Odom. "There's a lot of guys on this floor who know more than me," he said. "They can help me a lot more than I can help the other guys."
TEAMWORK
. "While other elite NBA stars were making movies and taking vacations, he worked out every morning at 6:45am and cheered on the Thunder rookies and some future Developmental League Players."
. He refused to appear on the cover of a magazine at Texas unless his teammates were included.
PERSEVERANCE
. He worked out EVERY MORNING this summer.....without having to let the whole world know about it.
While other superstars strategize to build their brand, Durant LIVES HIS BRAND! Parents and coaches should take advantage of this golden opportunity to promote the actions of a mega superstar who actually walks the walk.
Sunday, August 15, 2010
Thursday, July 8, 2010
Durant Would Not Be King!
While many of his peers were working every possible angle to remain in the center of media attention this week, Durant refused to talk about his contract negotiations with the Oklahoma City Thunder. Yesterday he made a long term commitment to his team by signing a 5 year extension with the Thunder. The contract does not include an early termination option which could have made him a free agent after the 4th year.
He announced the signing without fanfare via twitter and headed immediately to Orlando to visit the Thunder's summer league team. The league consists of young players, including some who will never play in the NBA. But Durant considers all of the players on the Oklahoma City squad his teammates. He wanted to be there to support them.
This young man understands what it takes to win. His words....and more importantly his actions....signal an intention to place the team, the organization, and the city ahead of his personal business. Like George Washington who put his country above personal glory, Kevin Durant refused to be King!
What a welcome role model for our kids!
He announced the signing without fanfare via twitter and headed immediately to Orlando to visit the Thunder's summer league team. The league consists of young players, including some who will never play in the NBA. But Durant considers all of the players on the Oklahoma City squad his teammates. He wanted to be there to support them.
This young man understands what it takes to win. His words....and more importantly his actions....signal an intention to place the team, the organization, and the city ahead of his personal business. Like George Washington who put his country above personal glory, Kevin Durant refused to be King!
What a welcome role model for our kids!
Sunday, June 20, 2010
Happy Father's Day!
I have attached a link to a great article from this morning's New York Times,"Still a Fan, Just With a Shorter Favorite Player" by Christopher Harder about how he learned to balance two of his passions.....a love for soccer and quality time with his young son. His story provides yet another example of the thin line that all Dads walk between unconditional love and letting go.
Harder's life changed with the birth of his son Nicholas. His priorities were altered dramatically. Travelling to Germany to cover the 2006 World Cup with an 11 month old was not a prudent family decision. Playing in adult pickup soccer games became a rare occurrence. "Joining the fatherhood league felt like joining a new team in a new country where everyone spoke another language," he lamented.
But instead of trying to find more time for soccer outside of his home environment, Harder decided to share his love for the game with his son. "I bought us each a new soccer ball. I practiced the beautiful game with him and I practiced being a father," he said. Nicholas's ball was underinflated to make it easier for him to control. Eventually Harder invented games in the driveway that his toddler could play with him. At age 4 he signed Nicholas up for a weekly soccer class in part to encourage a "shy Nicholas to socialize."
Nicholas displayed a case of nerves on the way to his first class. "As I drove him to the park, Harder said, I talked up the class - in vain." When they arrived at practice, he did not force Nicholas to jump right into the action. He hugged his Dad "like a goalkeeper hugging a goalpost." After some nudging he "thought the better of it" and pulled back. After about 10 minutes, Nicholas joined the class. Harder stayed around to keep an eye on his 4 year old, but remained in the background to give Nicholas his space.
At this moment Harder began to think ahead to a time when Nicholas would "choose to create his own space between us, and how as he gains independence from us, I'll miss his company tremendously." On one rainy day Nicholas left the field to get a raincoat. As he slipped it on, Harder made a positive comment about his dribbling. "I thought he would stay by my side, Harder recounted, but he ran back onto the wet field, ready to play again. He likes to play in the rain. He's got what it takes to be a soccer player."
At this moment Harder demonstrated an awareness that escapes many young parents (including yours truly 21 years ago!). He understands how important it will be for his son to one day become his own person. He is watching the World Cup at home again this summer with Nicholas and can now "focus on the soccer field instead of Nicholas's every step." During the games he tells him "about the artistry of Spain and Brazil and the magic of Xavi and Kaka." He also tries to juggle his World Cup replica ball. "I flick it into the air and I routinely drop it, he says. But I always aim to keep my balance........as I step in and step back."
Now that's unconditional love! Happy Father's Day to all the Dads out there!
http://www.nytimes.com/2010/06/20/sports/soccer/20cheer.html?scp=1&sq=Still%20A%20Fan,%20Just%20With%20A%20Shorter%20Favorite%20Player&st=cse
Harder's life changed with the birth of his son Nicholas. His priorities were altered dramatically. Travelling to Germany to cover the 2006 World Cup with an 11 month old was not a prudent family decision. Playing in adult pickup soccer games became a rare occurrence. "Joining the fatherhood league felt like joining a new team in a new country where everyone spoke another language," he lamented.
But instead of trying to find more time for soccer outside of his home environment, Harder decided to share his love for the game with his son. "I bought us each a new soccer ball. I practiced the beautiful game with him and I practiced being a father," he said. Nicholas's ball was underinflated to make it easier for him to control. Eventually Harder invented games in the driveway that his toddler could play with him. At age 4 he signed Nicholas up for a weekly soccer class in part to encourage a "shy Nicholas to socialize."
Nicholas displayed a case of nerves on the way to his first class. "As I drove him to the park, Harder said, I talked up the class - in vain." When they arrived at practice, he did not force Nicholas to jump right into the action. He hugged his Dad "like a goalkeeper hugging a goalpost." After some nudging he "thought the better of it" and pulled back. After about 10 minutes, Nicholas joined the class. Harder stayed around to keep an eye on his 4 year old, but remained in the background to give Nicholas his space.
At this moment Harder began to think ahead to a time when Nicholas would "choose to create his own space between us, and how as he gains independence from us, I'll miss his company tremendously." On one rainy day Nicholas left the field to get a raincoat. As he slipped it on, Harder made a positive comment about his dribbling. "I thought he would stay by my side, Harder recounted, but he ran back onto the wet field, ready to play again. He likes to play in the rain. He's got what it takes to be a soccer player."
At this moment Harder demonstrated an awareness that escapes many young parents (including yours truly 21 years ago!). He understands how important it will be for his son to one day become his own person. He is watching the World Cup at home again this summer with Nicholas and can now "focus on the soccer field instead of Nicholas's every step." During the games he tells him "about the artistry of Spain and Brazil and the magic of Xavi and Kaka." He also tries to juggle his World Cup replica ball. "I flick it into the air and I routinely drop it, he says. But I always aim to keep my balance........as I step in and step back."
Now that's unconditional love! Happy Father's Day to all the Dads out there!
http://www.nytimes.com/2010/06/20/sports/soccer/20cheer.html?scp=1&sq=Still%20A%20Fan,%20Just%20With%20A%20Shorter%20Favorite%20Player&st=cse
Monday, June 7, 2010
You Don't Have To "Like" The Coach
What John Wooden's former players remember most about their experience playing for him are the life lessons he taught them. Many of these players have stated that they had no idea what they had learned until several years after leaving UCLA. In the long run, the values that Coach Wooden imparted were more impactful than what they had learned about basketball. One of the most enlightening tales being recounted this week, comes from a former benchwarmer.
In an article from today's NY Times, "Championship Legacy Distinguishes Wooden But Doesn't Define Him", former Bruin Andy Hill, talks to Billy Witz about his experience as a reserve on the 1970-1972 UCLA teams. "For nearly 25 years after he graduated from UCLA Hill did not think much of these lessons - or of Wooden. He had become the President of CBS Productions, but he looked back on his playing days mostly with resentment. Hill starred on the freshman team at UCLA, sharing the team's Most Valuable Player award with Henry Bibby. But in three years on the varsity he rarely played. Then one day on the golf course, Hill's playing partner told him he was rushing his swing. It reminded him of one of Wooden's pet phrases - be quick, but don't hurry - and as he began to consider all of the other principles he had carried from Wooden, he picked up the phone to call him and say thanks." Hill later wrote a book titled "Be Quick - But Don't Hurry!" about the lessons he learned playing under Coach Wooden.
In today's sports world, coaches are too often viewed as client service providers. A parent once told me that she and her son did not like the coach of his team. His team although young and undersized had improved tremendously, beating teams in the league tournament that had handled them easily during the regular season. The coach had conducted very demanding practices, but he was not abusive. I could see how people might think he was a bit rough around the edges. He was young, bright, and full of enthusiasm, but at least at this stage of his career, he is definately not a charmer. But his team had overachieved and played very hard.....together!
Instead of focussing on what a coach can offer your adolescent child in "his" quest for a spot on the varsity, consider reinforcing the concepts of effort and teamwork. The players on our Final Four and National Championship teams at Texas did not fully understand at the time the kind of impact all of the hard work (and hard times!) they experienced would have on their lives. I certainly didn't. While working toward those accomplisments there were very few instances when we all held hands and sang kumbaya! But we all sensed that we were persevering to achieve something special. As the years pass by, it becomes more clear that the specialness extends well beyond the trophy!
In an article from today's NY Times, "Championship Legacy Distinguishes Wooden But Doesn't Define Him", former Bruin Andy Hill, talks to Billy Witz about his experience as a reserve on the 1970-1972 UCLA teams. "For nearly 25 years after he graduated from UCLA Hill did not think much of these lessons - or of Wooden. He had become the President of CBS Productions, but he looked back on his playing days mostly with resentment. Hill starred on the freshman team at UCLA, sharing the team's Most Valuable Player award with Henry Bibby. But in three years on the varsity he rarely played. Then one day on the golf course, Hill's playing partner told him he was rushing his swing. It reminded him of one of Wooden's pet phrases - be quick, but don't hurry - and as he began to consider all of the other principles he had carried from Wooden, he picked up the phone to call him and say thanks." Hill later wrote a book titled "Be Quick - But Don't Hurry!" about the lessons he learned playing under Coach Wooden.
In today's sports world, coaches are too often viewed as client service providers. A parent once told me that she and her son did not like the coach of his team. His team although young and undersized had improved tremendously, beating teams in the league tournament that had handled them easily during the regular season. The coach had conducted very demanding practices, but he was not abusive. I could see how people might think he was a bit rough around the edges. He was young, bright, and full of enthusiasm, but at least at this stage of his career, he is definately not a charmer. But his team had overachieved and played very hard.....together!
Instead of focussing on what a coach can offer your adolescent child in "his" quest for a spot on the varsity, consider reinforcing the concepts of effort and teamwork. The players on our Final Four and National Championship teams at Texas did not fully understand at the time the kind of impact all of the hard work (and hard times!) they experienced would have on their lives. I certainly didn't. While working toward those accomplisments there were very few instances when we all held hands and sang kumbaya! But we all sensed that we were persevering to achieve something special. As the years pass by, it becomes more clear that the specialness extends well beyond the trophy!
Monday, May 24, 2010
No One Is Too Big To Fail
The story of Abraham Lincoln's life....overcoming adversity at seemingly every turn of his life.....may be familiar to many people. But some of the other stories of high profile individuals featured on this short youtube clip might surprise you. All of them persevered through failure and rejection to achieve excellence. How would they fare if raised in today's PR crafted, celebrity-obsessed, failure-is-not-an-option culture?
How does this relate to youth sports? Well because it's important for children to be allowed to mess up. Research has shown that the profile of the child most likely to struggle in adulthood is the Big Man On Campus because he never faces adversity......until it's too late. As a parent I wanted my boys to experience failure. Too many parents want their kids to be viewed as successful at all times. If they are allowed to fail, they will fall behind their peers. "What's going to happen to my boy if he's not keeping up with Johnny?!"
The problem with this line of thinking is two fold. It's not practical because projecting future success based on how you rate as a 14 year old is impossible. More importantly children who feel that they HAVE TO BE SUCCESSFUL stop striving. Instead of constantly seeking to improve, they feel pressure to settle for a favorable perception. This is why so many athletes get to college and stop working. In their minds they've arrived!
As Bill Gates once said "It's fine to celebrate success, but it's more important to heed the lessons of failure." When your child stumbles, let him get up on his own. Restrain yourself now so that your child will hold up later......when it really counts. The bailout craze does not apply to parenting!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y6hz_s2XIAU
How does this relate to youth sports? Well because it's important for children to be allowed to mess up. Research has shown that the profile of the child most likely to struggle in adulthood is the Big Man On Campus because he never faces adversity......until it's too late. As a parent I wanted my boys to experience failure. Too many parents want their kids to be viewed as successful at all times. If they are allowed to fail, they will fall behind their peers. "What's going to happen to my boy if he's not keeping up with Johnny?!"
The problem with this line of thinking is two fold. It's not practical because projecting future success based on how you rate as a 14 year old is impossible. More importantly children who feel that they HAVE TO BE SUCCESSFUL stop striving. Instead of constantly seeking to improve, they feel pressure to settle for a favorable perception. This is why so many athletes get to college and stop working. In their minds they've arrived!
As Bill Gates once said "It's fine to celebrate success, but it's more important to heed the lessons of failure." When your child stumbles, let him get up on his own. Restrain yourself now so that your child will hold up later......when it really counts. The bailout craze does not apply to parenting!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y6hz_s2XIAU
Thursday, May 20, 2010
Hmmm....Which One Would You Rather Coach?
Will your child be prepared when he gets to a level where the competition is real (all of his peers are as good or better than he is) and his coach calls him out? How will he respond? Here is how two different professional baseball players responded following confrontations with their managers.
During a game in 2008 Jimmy Rollins, star shortstop for the Philadelphia Phillies, was benched by manager Charlie Manual for failing to hustle. Here's what Rollins said to the media after the game:
"He (Manager Charlie Manual) has two rules:be on time and hustle; and I broke one of them. I know better. Sometimes the manager gets you. I have to go out there and make sure I don't do it again. It's something you learn from."
In a recent game Hanley Ramirez, star shortstop for the Florida Marlins,was benched by manager Fredi Gonzalez for failing to hustle on a play where he had booted the ball into the outfield. Here's what Ramirez said to the media following the game:
"It's his team. He can do whatever. There is nothing I can do about it. We got alot of people dogging it after ground balls. They don't apologize. That's ok. He doesn't understand that. He's never played in the big leagues."
If you like the way Rollins handled himself and you want to ensure that your child is prepared to respond to this kind of situation in a similar fashion, talk about the importance of developing 4 key relationships:
RELATIONSHIP TO TEAM
- The team is top priority - the framework for all decisions
- The team is everyone's responsibility
RELATIONSHIP TO TEAMMATES
- Deal with the essentials (things that are important).
- Tolerate the non-essentials (personality conflicts).
RELATIONSHIP TO COACH
- Fulfill a role as defined by the coach and trust that the coach knows
what's best for the team.
- Communicate directly with the coach about any team-related issues.
RELATIONSHIP TO SELF
- Learn to persevere through adversity....demanding practices and dis-
appointing performances while striving for continual improvement.
As soon as your child begins playing on teams, emphasize that he is responsible for developing and maintaining these relationships. This emphasis on personal accountability allows for the values inherent to become INTRINSIC.
Working to help embed these concepts is far more important than rewarding accomplishments. Studley Dudley, middle school phenom, will eventually have to face that kid who used to be small and clueless, but now is stronger and ready to compete every day!
During a game in 2008 Jimmy Rollins, star shortstop for the Philadelphia Phillies, was benched by manager Charlie Manual for failing to hustle. Here's what Rollins said to the media after the game:
"He (Manager Charlie Manual) has two rules:be on time and hustle; and I broke one of them. I know better. Sometimes the manager gets you. I have to go out there and make sure I don't do it again. It's something you learn from."
In a recent game Hanley Ramirez, star shortstop for the Florida Marlins,was benched by manager Fredi Gonzalez for failing to hustle on a play where he had booted the ball into the outfield. Here's what Ramirez said to the media following the game:
"It's his team. He can do whatever. There is nothing I can do about it. We got alot of people dogging it after ground balls. They don't apologize. That's ok. He doesn't understand that. He's never played in the big leagues."
If you like the way Rollins handled himself and you want to ensure that your child is prepared to respond to this kind of situation in a similar fashion, talk about the importance of developing 4 key relationships:
RELATIONSHIP TO TEAM
- The team is top priority - the framework for all decisions
- The team is everyone's responsibility
RELATIONSHIP TO TEAMMATES
- Deal with the essentials (things that are important).
- Tolerate the non-essentials (personality conflicts).
RELATIONSHIP TO COACH
- Fulfill a role as defined by the coach and trust that the coach knows
what's best for the team.
- Communicate directly with the coach about any team-related issues.
RELATIONSHIP TO SELF
- Learn to persevere through adversity....demanding practices and dis-
appointing performances while striving for continual improvement.
As soon as your child begins playing on teams, emphasize that he is responsible for developing and maintaining these relationships. This emphasis on personal accountability allows for the values inherent to become INTRINSIC.
Working to help embed these concepts is far more important than rewarding accomplishments. Studley Dudley, middle school phenom, will eventually have to face that kid who used to be small and clueless, but now is stronger and ready to compete every day!
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
It's Not What You Sell, It's What You Stand For.......
.....is the title of a great business book written by Roy Spence, co founder of GSDM. The title occurred to me while reading about the resurgence of the Phoenix Suns. The Suns just swept the San Antonio Spurs, their long time nemesis to advance to the NBA Western Conference Finals. In an interview with Jonathan Abrams of the NY Times today, Grant Hill and Steve Nash talk about how team togetherness enabled the team to finally get over the hump and overcome the Spurs after being knocked out of the playoffs by them five times since 1997.
When Hill first entered the league, he sensed that "team commitment and unity was not quite the same on the professional level." Eventually by watching certain teams like the Spurs flourish, he became convinced that team unity could make a difference in the NBA. According to both Hill and Nash, the Suns improved dramatically this season in large part because they became a close knit unit. "We're not the most talented team, said Nash, but we believe in each other."
Abrams hit the nail on the head when he commented that "while NBA teams with subpar chemistry and star athletes can succeed, good chemistry can probably pole vault other clubs to greater heights." Most of the top teams in the NBA have a superstar, but to actually win the title everyone, including the superstar, must buy into the importance of fulfilling a role for the team.
What should kids and parents take away from this post? Well simply that certain pro franchises are first and foremost about "what they sell" and others prioritize "what they stand for"......winning. And while it's fine to be entertained by the Cowboys and Mavericks, hopefu;lly kids are being encouraged to emulate the team ethic displayed by teams like the Suns.
When Hill first entered the league, he sensed that "team commitment and unity was not quite the same on the professional level." Eventually by watching certain teams like the Spurs flourish, he became convinced that team unity could make a difference in the NBA. According to both Hill and Nash, the Suns improved dramatically this season in large part because they became a close knit unit. "We're not the most talented team, said Nash, but we believe in each other."
Abrams hit the nail on the head when he commented that "while NBA teams with subpar chemistry and star athletes can succeed, good chemistry can probably pole vault other clubs to greater heights." Most of the top teams in the NBA have a superstar, but to actually win the title everyone, including the superstar, must buy into the importance of fulfilling a role for the team.
What should kids and parents take away from this post? Well simply that certain pro franchises are first and foremost about "what they sell" and others prioritize "what they stand for"......winning. And while it's fine to be entertained by the Cowboys and Mavericks, hopefu;lly kids are being encouraged to emulate the team ethic displayed by teams like the Suns.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)