It's obvious that Manu Ginobli is a tough guy. He not only scores, but also does dirty work like diving for loose balls and closing out furiously on his man (which is a great way to gauge "want to" in a player!). In a recent USA Today article, it was pointed out that when Ginobli first came to the Spurs he and Gregg Popovich frequently clashed. Manu's creativity and risk taking did not sit well with the more conservative Popovich. They eventually worked it out. Popovich was able to convince him that on a diving-for-loose-balls scale of 1 to 10 he didn't "need as many 10's." But he also realized that he needed to let Ginobli take more chances than he would normally be comfortable with.
I used to love this kind of "good high maintenance" player. A coach should want to work with players who are stubborn, aggressive, and highly competitive. If you demonstrate how much you love these qualities, you will eventually sell them on the benefits of channeling their energies for optimum performance. This process can result in some very tense moments. But conflict is absolutely required to build a strong coach:player relationship. I preferred working with players who put pressure on me. Players who always wanted to please made me nervous!
The "coach pleaser" usually evolves into a "bad high maintenance" player. Instead of first looking inward when something goes wrong they immediately search for someone else to blame. They are uninspired, energy suckers. There is no conflict just a lot of handholding......and it's exhausting! If they are not constantly affirmed, they fall apart.
The ideal player:coach relationship begins with the PLAYER inspiring the coach. If the coach is expected to be the primary source of motivation, underachievement is inevitable. Give me good high maintenance any day!
Friday, April 30, 2010
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
Culture Of Winning
In an interview with the New York Times, Bill Carter, co-founder of Fuse, a youth marketing agency, talks about lessons he learned early in his life while playing lacrosse. In both high school and college he was part of extremely successful programs. His high school team was the dominant program in the country. "I don't remember losing more than three games in all of high school, he says. I was in this culture of winning where all the coaches, the players, the kids in that school and the administrators expected us to win." He described his experience playing for legendary coach Hank Janczyk at Gettysburg College in much the same way.
During the interview Carter captured the essence of the most crucial lesson he learned during his playing days when he said that "every game was judged not only on whether we won or lost and what the score was, but on how we played." He now applies this concept to the way his firm evaluates their business pitches. "If we win, he said, I still evaluate the pitch and whether it was the best portrayal of who we are, or whether we won for some other reason. And when we lose new business pitches or don't do an exceptionally good job for a client in the client's eyes, I can still evaluate it based on factors other than the final result."
Carter's firm does well for the same reason that his lacrosse teams were successful. A laser like focus on excellence is the key to establishing a winning culture in any organization. The best coaches never let either wins or losses knock them off stride. They are constantly looking for ways to improve their team's performance. They are never satisfied!
I was convinced that Carter had been part of something special when he described the practices at Gettysburg as being "unbelievably competitive" every day. If every member of a team is willing to do battle each day in practice, special things are possible. When you listen to athletes from top programs discuss their college sports experiences, it takes awhile for any mention of trophy ceremonies to surface. Recently some of my former players at Texas were asked to share reflections from their years as Longhorns with the current team.
All of the former Longhorns were part of teams that had advanced to the Final Four or won a National Championship. Despite the fact that they represented three different teams, their messages were strikingly similar! The notion that "excellence was a way of life", as one player put it, was a recurring theme. The same player expressed (in all caps for emphasis) that the reason her team was so good was "BECAUSE WE PUSHED EACH OTHER EVERY DAY TO GET BETTER." They talked about struggling together, overcoming failure, not giving an inch, and being gritty to describe their mentality........in practice! And the only mention of a trophy was made by a player who took pride in the part HER TEAM played to set the stage for the NEXT TEAM to win a national championship!
That kind of athlete is a vanishing breed. Too many of today's youth lack the ability to focus on excellence day in and day out to achieve something special. They are not results ORIENTED, they are results OBSESSED. They have not been empowered to develop internal motivation because their systems have been overwhelmed by outside forces seeking to control them. It is crucial that parents reward their child's effort and competitive spirit particularly during the elementary and middle school years. A highly successful businessman and entrepeneur once told me parents need to understand that this period of a child's life "is not the big game." Instead of focussing on doing whatever it takes to "put them ahead of where they are", as one teacher puts it, parents should reinforce the qualities that their children will need when there is real competition.
Your child can max out on private lessons and participate on "select" teams every season, but in the long run the cream always rises to the top. The best athletes are going to play. Some will reach the promised land of college sports and most will not, but either way eventually they're all going to have to compete with the Bill Carters of the world!
During the interview Carter captured the essence of the most crucial lesson he learned during his playing days when he said that "every game was judged not only on whether we won or lost and what the score was, but on how we played." He now applies this concept to the way his firm evaluates their business pitches. "If we win, he said, I still evaluate the pitch and whether it was the best portrayal of who we are, or whether we won for some other reason. And when we lose new business pitches or don't do an exceptionally good job for a client in the client's eyes, I can still evaluate it based on factors other than the final result."
Carter's firm does well for the same reason that his lacrosse teams were successful. A laser like focus on excellence is the key to establishing a winning culture in any organization. The best coaches never let either wins or losses knock them off stride. They are constantly looking for ways to improve their team's performance. They are never satisfied!
I was convinced that Carter had been part of something special when he described the practices at Gettysburg as being "unbelievably competitive" every day. If every member of a team is willing to do battle each day in practice, special things are possible. When you listen to athletes from top programs discuss their college sports experiences, it takes awhile for any mention of trophy ceremonies to surface. Recently some of my former players at Texas were asked to share reflections from their years as Longhorns with the current team.
All of the former Longhorns were part of teams that had advanced to the Final Four or won a National Championship. Despite the fact that they represented three different teams, their messages were strikingly similar! The notion that "excellence was a way of life", as one player put it, was a recurring theme. The same player expressed (in all caps for emphasis) that the reason her team was so good was "BECAUSE WE PUSHED EACH OTHER EVERY DAY TO GET BETTER." They talked about struggling together, overcoming failure, not giving an inch, and being gritty to describe their mentality........in practice! And the only mention of a trophy was made by a player who took pride in the part HER TEAM played to set the stage for the NEXT TEAM to win a national championship!
That kind of athlete is a vanishing breed. Too many of today's youth lack the ability to focus on excellence day in and day out to achieve something special. They are not results ORIENTED, they are results OBSESSED. They have not been empowered to develop internal motivation because their systems have been overwhelmed by outside forces seeking to control them. It is crucial that parents reward their child's effort and competitive spirit particularly during the elementary and middle school years. A highly successful businessman and entrepeneur once told me parents need to understand that this period of a child's life "is not the big game." Instead of focussing on doing whatever it takes to "put them ahead of where they are", as one teacher puts it, parents should reinforce the qualities that their children will need when there is real competition.
Your child can max out on private lessons and participate on "select" teams every season, but in the long run the cream always rises to the top. The best athletes are going to play. Some will reach the promised land of college sports and most will not, but either way eventually they're all going to have to compete with the Bill Carters of the world!
Thursday, April 15, 2010
Just Let 'Em Play......It Pays off!!
Mark Hyman, author of "Until It Hurts: America's Obsession With Youth Sports and How It Harms Our Kids," recently wrote a column about an interesting experiment taking place in New York called Sandlot Day 2010.Tim Donovan, director of the Youth Sports Institute, came up with the idea. In January he began to promote it to youth leagues across the state encouraging them to create one day of baseball where the kids have completely control over every aspect of the organization. Donovan's goal is to convince 25 leagues in New York to participate this summer. "We're not the sports sheriff, he said. "We think organized baseball is great. But we think it's also good for kids to play home run derby, to have a passion and a sense of ownership about their sports."
This is a great idea and it's beginning to catch on in other places around the country in the form of weekly programs and summer camps at local Recreation Centers. Little League still provides a wonderful experience for kids. The problem is that nearly every other free moment of their lives is organized for them as well. Recollections from my childhood are dominated by memories of pick up basketball games at a neighbor's house and impromptu baseball games at the park. We chose our own teams, settled our own disputes, and often made up our own rules. The only time we heard from a parent was when one of us was late for dinner!
In today's world it is not always safe to let children run off and play in the park unsupervised. However, because kids rarely engage in free play without adults around, peer socialization has suffered. David Elkind, professor of child development at Tufts University, says that "One tangible result of the lack of socialization is the increase in bullying, teasing, and discrimination that we see in all too many of our schools." In the past children learned, as Elkind put it, "to settle their own quarrels, make and break their own rules, and to respect the rights of others. They learned that friends could be mean as well as kind, and that life was not always fair."
Parents are and always will be a child's most important teachers. Talking about and modeling good values along with establishing boundaries are the most crucial elements in a child's development. But children learn how to solve problems through interactions with peers. As Donovan says, "The lessons learned from choosing sides......negotiation, conflict, resolution.....they're the building blocks of civilization." Allowing children to take part in situations where they have to work things out enables them to develop a sense of self. Young people who have been subject to constant control and scrutiny by adults never have to learn how to take responsibility for their own actions.
My advice to parents is to worry less about making sure that your child is getting enough structure and be more concerned with creating a balance between organized events and unsupervised time. I am relieved that my boys grew up before "select" sports became so all consuming. They played on organized teams when they were young, but spent at least as much time up the street playing pick up games with kids in the neighborhood. Despite the lack of adult supervision and expertise, several high school stars and college athletes emerged from that group. More importantly they have become independent, self sufficient young adults.
This is a great idea and it's beginning to catch on in other places around the country in the form of weekly programs and summer camps at local Recreation Centers. Little League still provides a wonderful experience for kids. The problem is that nearly every other free moment of their lives is organized for them as well. Recollections from my childhood are dominated by memories of pick up basketball games at a neighbor's house and impromptu baseball games at the park. We chose our own teams, settled our own disputes, and often made up our own rules. The only time we heard from a parent was when one of us was late for dinner!
In today's world it is not always safe to let children run off and play in the park unsupervised. However, because kids rarely engage in free play without adults around, peer socialization has suffered. David Elkind, professor of child development at Tufts University, says that "One tangible result of the lack of socialization is the increase in bullying, teasing, and discrimination that we see in all too many of our schools." In the past children learned, as Elkind put it, "to settle their own quarrels, make and break their own rules, and to respect the rights of others. They learned that friends could be mean as well as kind, and that life was not always fair."
Parents are and always will be a child's most important teachers. Talking about and modeling good values along with establishing boundaries are the most crucial elements in a child's development. But children learn how to solve problems through interactions with peers. As Donovan says, "The lessons learned from choosing sides......negotiation, conflict, resolution.....they're the building blocks of civilization." Allowing children to take part in situations where they have to work things out enables them to develop a sense of self. Young people who have been subject to constant control and scrutiny by adults never have to learn how to take responsibility for their own actions.
My advice to parents is to worry less about making sure that your child is getting enough structure and be more concerned with creating a balance between organized events and unsupervised time. I am relieved that my boys grew up before "select" sports became so all consuming. They played on organized teams when they were young, but spent at least as much time up the street playing pick up games with kids in the neighborhood. Despite the lack of adult supervision and expertise, several high school stars and college athletes emerged from that group. More importantly they have become independent, self sufficient young adults.
Monday, April 12, 2010
Humility Breeds Self Confidence
On April 9th David Brooks wrote an op-ed piece in the New York Times contrasting two different leadership styles that exist in today's corporate world. For me, the message derived from his column also resonates in a much more challenging arena......the parenting world.
Brooks describes his first class of leaders as "boardroom lions". He portrays them as "superconfident, forceful, and charismatic" always seeking "relentless transformational change." He goes on to say that "We can all point to successful leaders who display this kind of self-confidence", but contends that "charismatic C.E.O.'s often produce volatile company performances." According to Jim Collins, author of "Good to Great," boardroom lions fall prey to "seductions that mark failing organizations" such as "faith in perpetual restructuring" and "the belief that one magic move will change everything." They are in command and control mode at all times making confident projections to convey what Brooks calls, "the illusion of control."
Brooks' optimal leadership style is the 'humble hound' model. He again cites Collins' who discovered that many of the truly successful leaders combine "extreme personal humility with intense professional will." The humble hound is reflective and has "a bias for caution." While the boardroom lion relies heavily on the "illusion of control", the humble hound sees the world as "too complex and irregular to be known." Life is about "navigating uncertainty" with the belief that progress is made "through a series of regulated errors......every move a partial failure to be corrected by the next one."
The command and control mode may get results in the work world, but it is a recipe for disaster as a strategy for raising a child. Any control that a parent may have over a child in elementary school disappears forever beginning in the middle school years. One minute they are innocent, fun loving kids always seeking to please adults. Then, all of a sudden everything in their lives seems to revolve around their peers. The squirrels who were gleefully darting in and out of traffic oblivious to cars zipping by are now daring you to run over them! You can force structure on them to an extent, but any notion of actual control is an 'illusion.' They value what their parents say (even though they don't always show it), but they are on a mission to find themselves......and on a quest to someday spread their own wings.
It is impossible to predict the future for our children. Brooks' humble hound persona works well for parents when confronting this daunting reality. Like the humble hound,'humble parents' give into the notion that the world is "too complex and irregular to be known." This act of submission enables them to let go when it is in the best interests of their child. There is a big difference between helping children chart their own course and forcing "perpetual restructuring" on them. Often the best reaction to a problem a child is facing is no reaction at all. Restraint empowers children to work things out on their own. The process can be messy at times, but they'll never learn unless they are allowed to stumble and pick themselves back up. The children of 'humble parents' do not require magic moves because they have learned how to "navigate uncertainty" flying under their own power!
Brooks describes his first class of leaders as "boardroom lions". He portrays them as "superconfident, forceful, and charismatic" always seeking "relentless transformational change." He goes on to say that "We can all point to successful leaders who display this kind of self-confidence", but contends that "charismatic C.E.O.'s often produce volatile company performances." According to Jim Collins, author of "Good to Great," boardroom lions fall prey to "seductions that mark failing organizations" such as "faith in perpetual restructuring" and "the belief that one magic move will change everything." They are in command and control mode at all times making confident projections to convey what Brooks calls, "the illusion of control."
Brooks' optimal leadership style is the 'humble hound' model. He again cites Collins' who discovered that many of the truly successful leaders combine "extreme personal humility with intense professional will." The humble hound is reflective and has "a bias for caution." While the boardroom lion relies heavily on the "illusion of control", the humble hound sees the world as "too complex and irregular to be known." Life is about "navigating uncertainty" with the belief that progress is made "through a series of regulated errors......every move a partial failure to be corrected by the next one."
The command and control mode may get results in the work world, but it is a recipe for disaster as a strategy for raising a child. Any control that a parent may have over a child in elementary school disappears forever beginning in the middle school years. One minute they are innocent, fun loving kids always seeking to please adults. Then, all of a sudden everything in their lives seems to revolve around their peers. The squirrels who were gleefully darting in and out of traffic oblivious to cars zipping by are now daring you to run over them! You can force structure on them to an extent, but any notion of actual control is an 'illusion.' They value what their parents say (even though they don't always show it), but they are on a mission to find themselves......and on a quest to someday spread their own wings.
It is impossible to predict the future for our children. Brooks' humble hound persona works well for parents when confronting this daunting reality. Like the humble hound,'humble parents' give into the notion that the world is "too complex and irregular to be known." This act of submission enables them to let go when it is in the best interests of their child. There is a big difference between helping children chart their own course and forcing "perpetual restructuring" on them. Often the best reaction to a problem a child is facing is no reaction at all. Restraint empowers children to work things out on their own. The process can be messy at times, but they'll never learn unless they are allowed to stumble and pick themselves back up. The children of 'humble parents' do not require magic moves because they have learned how to "navigate uncertainty" flying under their own power!
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
Character Counts!
Like many of us, Brent Bell, former high school basketball coach and current Head of the Upper School at the Randolph School in Huntsville, Alabama was impressed with Butler's run during the NCAA Basketball tournament. He emailed members of Randolph's faculty and staff to share comments that "jumped off the screen" at him during the telecast of Monday night's championship game. One of Brent's observations regarding comments made by Butler coach Brad Stevens after the game was particularly compelling to me. During the postgame press conference Stevens very purposely stated:
"We are Butler and we are going to keep doing this the Butler way. We are going to keep recruiting the types of kids we recruit(kids who won in high school, kids who will play a role, kids who will compete all the time) and if we don't catch 'lightning in a bottle' and reach the championship game or win a national title so be it. We are who we are and we are proud of it."
How refeshing! In the program's most shining moment, the coach talks about the mission of Butler basketball! Instead of submitting to vacuous coachspeak to put the best spin on the loss, he stuck with the team's core values. In every interview that Stevens did during the tournament you got the feeling that when he looked into the camera and spoke, he meant what he said. He refused to get caught up in the perception-is-reality culture surrounding him.
What makes Stevens so believable is that his players actually LIVE OUT the program's mission. They had to "compete all the time" just to defend opposing teams stocked with bigger, more athletic players. The true measure of a competitor in any sport is a willingness to grind on defense. By the end of the tournament it seemed like every Butler player had been described as a great on ball defender! It also took a team of players who "will play a role" to stay in games with teams bringing high school all americans off the bench. Gordon Hayward, Butler's best player, proudly stated that "the ability of our team to say 'next person up' is special."
Steven's third point about recruiting "kids who won in high school" seems obvious, but it is not. So many basketball players are recruited based on their ability to fill stat sheets during summer tournaments. The AAU circuit is unabashedly about showcasing talent not winning. The Butler players competed like winners. They handled success and adversity the same way. When the other team made a run, they kept executing. When the Bulldogs got ahead, they played defense even harder to preserve the lead. There was never a sense of panic on the Butler bench.
In today's image-is-everything sports world where success is too often based on entertainment value and the buzz that accompanies it, the Butler basketball program is bucking the trend. In the same year that John Wooden is voted the greatest coach of all time in a poll conducted (ironically) by the ENTERTAINMENT Sports and Programming Network, Brad Stevens and his Bulldogs embody one of Coach Wooden's most famous admonitions: "Be more concerned with your character than your reputation, because your character is what you really are, while your reputation is merely what others think you are."
"We are Butler and we are going to keep doing this the Butler way. We are going to keep recruiting the types of kids we recruit(kids who won in high school, kids who will play a role, kids who will compete all the time) and if we don't catch 'lightning in a bottle' and reach the championship game or win a national title so be it. We are who we are and we are proud of it."
How refeshing! In the program's most shining moment, the coach talks about the mission of Butler basketball! Instead of submitting to vacuous coachspeak to put the best spin on the loss, he stuck with the team's core values. In every interview that Stevens did during the tournament you got the feeling that when he looked into the camera and spoke, he meant what he said. He refused to get caught up in the perception-is-reality culture surrounding him.
What makes Stevens so believable is that his players actually LIVE OUT the program's mission. They had to "compete all the time" just to defend opposing teams stocked with bigger, more athletic players. The true measure of a competitor in any sport is a willingness to grind on defense. By the end of the tournament it seemed like every Butler player had been described as a great on ball defender! It also took a team of players who "will play a role" to stay in games with teams bringing high school all americans off the bench. Gordon Hayward, Butler's best player, proudly stated that "the ability of our team to say 'next person up' is special."
Steven's third point about recruiting "kids who won in high school" seems obvious, but it is not. So many basketball players are recruited based on their ability to fill stat sheets during summer tournaments. The AAU circuit is unabashedly about showcasing talent not winning. The Butler players competed like winners. They handled success and adversity the same way. When the other team made a run, they kept executing. When the Bulldogs got ahead, they played defense even harder to preserve the lead. There was never a sense of panic on the Butler bench.
In today's image-is-everything sports world where success is too often based on entertainment value and the buzz that accompanies it, the Butler basketball program is bucking the trend. In the same year that John Wooden is voted the greatest coach of all time in a poll conducted (ironically) by the ENTERTAINMENT Sports and Programming Network, Brad Stevens and his Bulldogs embody one of Coach Wooden's most famous admonitions: "Be more concerned with your character than your reputation, because your character is what you really are, while your reputation is merely what others think you are."
Friday, April 2, 2010
Why We Coach - Part I
I recently received a text message from Chetan Panda, a member of my 9th grade and JV basketball teams at St. Stephens School, that made me reflect on what is really important about coaching young people. In his text he said: "all four teams that made the final four are good TEAMS." Chetan is in college now. His emphasis on the word team reinforced the notion that what athletes learn through their experiences on a team often stays with them long after their playing careers are over. As they get older (some of my former athletes are in their 50's!), values derived from being on a team become even more embedded in their approach to life.
Often coaches evaluate the impact they have on their athletes based strictly on the team's final record. If the team does not achieve a certain result, they have failed. Chetan and his teammates were not imposing talents. His team did not win a championship, but they did overachieve. As he and his teammates stepped onto the court for a game against Copperas Cove, a much larger school, a fan commented that they looked small. One of the St. Stephens Dads overheard the comment and quickly added, "and they're slow too!"
The boys defeated Copperas Cove by out-competing and out-executing them. This was possible because in practice they submitted themselves to what at times seemed like unreasonable demands from their coach and pushed each other relentlessly. Achieving excellence requires change and change is painful. As Michigan State basketball coach Tom Izzo said to the media this week: "If it doesn't hurt, if it isn't painful to go through a practice, you haven't done enough." Chetan and his teammates persevered through tough times together day after day. They truly bonded as a team and always put themselves in the best position to win. More importantly, the lessons that they have taken away from their experience together will benefit them even more as adults.
It is assumed by many that those of us who have had long coaching careers spend a lot of time thinking about all of our accomplishments. Trophies and awards are great, but the most rewarding aspect of my career has been watching athletes grow as people after they move on, knowing that I played some small part in their development. I cannot recall much about the trophy ceremonies that I was fortunate to be a part of. However, I can vividly recount displays of inspiring work ethic, competitive tension, and humor that give me goosebumps! And witnessing the values instilled during these moments come into full bloom later in life is truly a magical feeling!
Often coaches evaluate the impact they have on their athletes based strictly on the team's final record. If the team does not achieve a certain result, they have failed. Chetan and his teammates were not imposing talents. His team did not win a championship, but they did overachieve. As he and his teammates stepped onto the court for a game against Copperas Cove, a much larger school, a fan commented that they looked small. One of the St. Stephens Dads overheard the comment and quickly added, "and they're slow too!"
The boys defeated Copperas Cove by out-competing and out-executing them. This was possible because in practice they submitted themselves to what at times seemed like unreasonable demands from their coach and pushed each other relentlessly. Achieving excellence requires change and change is painful. As Michigan State basketball coach Tom Izzo said to the media this week: "If it doesn't hurt, if it isn't painful to go through a practice, you haven't done enough." Chetan and his teammates persevered through tough times together day after day. They truly bonded as a team and always put themselves in the best position to win. More importantly, the lessons that they have taken away from their experience together will benefit them even more as adults.
It is assumed by many that those of us who have had long coaching careers spend a lot of time thinking about all of our accomplishments. Trophies and awards are great, but the most rewarding aspect of my career has been watching athletes grow as people after they move on, knowing that I played some small part in their development. I cannot recall much about the trophy ceremonies that I was fortunate to be a part of. However, I can vividly recount displays of inspiring work ethic, competitive tension, and humor that give me goosebumps! And witnessing the values instilled during these moments come into full bloom later in life is truly a magical feeling!
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